(970)314-4397 amymwilliams@hotmail.com

     I love to learn. I will be learning from my last breath. One of my most favorite teachers is relationships. However, relationships are regularly severed due to deception and hence i think it’s important to give deception an autopsy. 

  1. One of the guaranteed lessons at Earth school is; to be betrayed and to betray others. It’s like arithmetic, reading and history; we simply have to learn about it. Why deception? Because we ALL have the ability to hurt others and to be hurt by them. It’s not personal, it’s just a lesson to heal otherwise hidden wounds. The same disdain I have someone, someone else has for me. Again, it’s not personal, it’s simply the medium to excavate a wound, repair it AND to realize we have the same ability to treat someone in the same ugly way. It always makes me pause to hear adults reference their childhood as a reason for the life they live now. I fully understand childhood trauma, it is surprising how high my ACE score is. That being said, if you feel that your childhood is running your life then you know exactly what to focus on next. We need teachers and we need lessons to experience the transformation of battles fought, initiation and rebirth. These lessons can come from any situation or relationship; professional, intimate, superficial, as we need people who will play these roles for OUR learning. Understood from a higher level of being, we made contracts with others to learn lessons together. The higher levels of existence are impersonal, it’s not the person who betrays you that is the focus, it’s you. You could be betrayed by your mom, dad, sibling, friend, uncle, boss, enemy, all of the above etc. It could be anyone so do not take the person as important, it’s the lesson it ignites within you that deserves your focus.
  2. I know the line that comes next: what about the horrendous, unforgivable acts done to the innocent? Is it better, or not, for the traumatized innocents to hold on to that brutality, anger, resentment, trauma etc? Our Wisdom Traditions have consistently taught us about the power of forgiveness. “Forgive us as we forgive those who trespass against us”. Having horrific acts done to you is brutal enough, holding onto that brutality throughout one’s life is self-inflicted suffering. I know this may be very challenging to hear if you have yet to do this. If you have already done it then you know it is the ultimate move to initiate freedom from pain. Let’s look at this subject from another angle.
  3. What about this perspective, Who have I betrayed? As physics and Life have taught us, lessons go both ways. The question is not; IF you have betrayed, it is WHO have you betrayed? (again, this speaks to the high importance the sages of all times have placed on the need for forgiveness) 
  4. Another consideration: What about a little appreciation for, if not for the person, at least for the situation that had the distasteful role of unearthing previously hidden wounds so you could free yourself (and hence all of Creation) from them? The reality exists that the wound may have originated from another time and being and this current scenario is just a reminder of what still needs to be healed so that we will no longer be driven by it. Again, this current version isn’t about the perpetrator, it’s about you finding freedom from pain. 

 

It’s been observed that people with tenuous relationships do not look at themselves honestly and/or see reality from the more expansive levels of understanding. Honesty and freedom from pain are not a priority in this culture so if one is following the mainstream this sort of reflection is not done. Few want to feel vulnerable because to look within means we will see how we too have deceived others. It also shows that one is not yet making the effort to free themselves from pain (a requirement for a healthy, enjoyable relationship). Does this behavior tell us of one who is more invested in dealing in the dark then the Light? Would you consciously engage in a relationship with such a person? I would be curious to see if the quality of relationships would increase as well as if the shelf life would change if we viewed them less personally? If we just took the message or lesson without shooting the messenger, how would that change the experience of relationships?